We Have To Be the Hope We Want To See

"The credit belongs to the man in the arena whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs, and who comes up short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause. The man, who at best knows the triumph of high achievement and who at worst, if he fails, fails while daring greatly."

~ Teddy Roosevelt

There is an Aesop Fable my grandmother once shared with me. (Grandmothers are great like that. They won’t tell you exactly what you are supposed to know. They tell you enough of what you need to hear so that you can figure things out for yourself.)


The story of the Crow and the Pitcher goes something like this:
A crow, half-dead with thirst, came upon a pitcher which had once been full of water; when the crow put its beak into the mouth of the pitcher he found that only very little water was left, and that he could not reach far enough down to get to it.

He tried, and he tried, but at last had to give up in despair. Then a thought came to him, and he took a pebble and dropped it into the pitcher. Then he took another pebble and dropped it into the pitcher. Again and again he continued to drop pebbles into the pitcher until at last, he saw the water mount up near him, and after casting in a few more pebbles he was able to quench his thirst and save his life.

We all have things that we long for. Sometimes we feel as if those goals are just outside our reach. We get discouraged. We make excuses. If only we had this… If only someone else would have done that…

We have to remind ourselves that we are the captains of our fate. We are the ones who choose our actions. We can choose to react or we can choose to be proactive. Whether the outcome is positive or negative, we must choose. We must decide on which course our story will be written.

One of the great philosophers of my day is quoted as saying, “Do or do not, there is no try” (Yoda, Star Wars).

How sad is it that we have become a society of TRY-ERS and not one of DO-ERS? We are satisfied with saying, “I gave it a shot”, rather than, “I failed and failed until I succeeded”. Many of the greats we tout as successes were once failures in their own right.

After being cut from his high school basketball team, MICHAEL JORDAN went home, locked himself in his room and cried; THE BEATLES were rejected from Decca Recording Studios, who said “we don’t like their sound”… “They have no future in show business.”;At 30 years old, STEVE JOBS was left devastated and depressed after being unceremoniously removed from the company he started; WALT DISNEY was fired from a newspaper for “lacking imagination” and “having no original ideas”; OPRAH WINFREY was demoted from her job as a news anchor because she… “Wasn’t fit for television”; and ALBERT EINSTEIN wasn’t able to speak until he was almost 4 years old. His teachers said he… “Would never amount to much.”

It could have been really easy for these individuals to take these failures to heart. How many countless others have taken negative criticism and failure to heart? How many truly great individuals will we never know? I encourage you to fight for your goals. Choose your destiny. And, if you lose your footing and fail, get back up and try, try again.

There is a new Christian artist I heard the other day while jogging. Her words stuck in my head and I could not get them out. If you get a chance, get a copy of Mandisa’s “Waiting for Tomorrow”. I am paraphrasing, but these are the words that spoke to me. I hope they do to you too.

“I can't spend my whole life wasting everything I know I've been given. You've made me for so much more than sitting on the side lines. I don't want to look back and wonder if good enough could've been better. Every day is a day to start over. So, why am I waiting for tomorrow? I'm making this my moment, now!”

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* This article was originally printed in the Sunday, August 19, 2012 issue

of The Chronicle's "Planting Seeds" column.

Fellowship

“The next best thing to being wise oneself is to live in a circle of those who are.”

~ C. S. Lewis

As many of you know, Mitch, Sandy and I recently returned from our Annual SEDC conference. This year the conference was in Myrtle Beach, South Carolina. It was my first time in South Carolina, and I must say they did it right! What a beautiful part of our country!

SEDC is the Southern Economic Development Council. It is a seventeen state organization comprised of Economic and Community Development practitioners who come together to share ideas and best practices of how to do business in the Southeastern part of the United States. Following our motto, at SEDC we Connect, Develop and Grow. (That being both as individuals and as the communities we represent).

One of the things I most admire about SEDC and one of the things I am proud to say I helped move forward is our YP (Young Professionals) group. Two years ago Chad Chancellor (originally from Waynesboro, currently in Paducah, KY) and I co-chaired the first YP committee. As co-chairs we officially got the ball rolling and have helped build the group into a pretty large collective of about fifty members. We don’t always get together in one location, however at the annual conferences we typically have better than half the group show up.

Now I am sure you are wondering, “So what? Everywhere has a YP group.” I would say that is very true. Most communities today are starting or have well established YP groups. The thing that most impresses me about this YP group is not that we are all 35 and under (and yes they are talking of unceremoniously removing me from the group since I am the oldest) but the fact that we all come from different geographic locations throughout the Southeast. Few of us come from the same state. Those of us that are in the same state are usually spread out and the only time we get to see each other face to face is at our state conferences and SEDC.

In addition to our backgroundsand location, what impresses me is that when we get together, many of us you would think we were siblings rather than professionals who work in the same field. I equate it to the “high school gang”. We all hang out. We share our lives with each other. We share our personal successes with each other. We even share our defeats with each other. We are more than friends.

I suppose it is because there is a security in knowing that many of us don’t have someone else in the group from “back home”. We can be ourselves and we can ask truly meaningful questions. And although we may not want to hear the answers, we can get brutally honest answers and direction.

To me, this group is more than just friendship. It is way beyond professional relationships. It is every bit fellowship.

Through fellowship we have a purpose. We have a mission. We are growing the profession through our community’s successes but we are also growing individuals through honest feedback, through compassion for one another and through our own experiences. Fellowship is not just a bunch of folks with common interests hanging out and drinking coffee. Fellowship is caring for the outcome of your fellow man (or woman).

I am very thankful for the time I am able to spend with this group. I am grateful for their feedback and I am hopeful for the future of this group and the future success of the Southeastern United States. If this is the leadership to take us into the future, I think we will be doing very well.

If you don’t currently have a group to fellowship with in your life, I encourage you to seek one out. They can be local, state-wide or regional. Find your commonalities. Find people who you can be honest with and who will in turn be honest with you. Through continued growth and development as individuals and as the collective community we will all grow and develop Jones County for generations to come. Good Luck!

Larkin

“Fellowship is a place of grace, where mistakes aren't rubbed in but rubbed out. Fellowship happens when mercy wins over justice.”

~ Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life: What on Earth am I Here for?

A Marble to Trade

"Each man is a hero and an oracle to somebody."

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

I heard this beautiful, yet simple personal leadership story the other day and would like to share it with you.

The story is told of a man whom the store owner, Mr. Miller, was bagging some potatoes for. This man noticed a small boy who he described as "hungrily appraising a basket of freshly picked green peas." He said he was, "delicate to the bone and feature, ragged but clean."

The man was looking over some of the new fresh produce on his way out when he overheard the conversation between Mr. Miller and the ragged boy.

"Hello Barry, how are you today?" The hungry boy replied "Hello Mr. Miller, fine, thank you. Just admiring those peas... they sure look good."

Each time the little boy would come to the store the conversation would have a similar tone. Mr. Miller would ask him how he was doing and how his mom was. She was sick, and they just didn't have much at home. This hungry young boy’s attention was always on the fresh produce.

Mr. Miller would always ask if Barry would like to take some home. Barry would reply "No, Sir. I’ve got nothing to pay for them with."

And Mr. Miller would say, "Well, what have you to trade me for some peas?" Barry would say, "All I’ve got is my prize marble."

"Is that right? Let me see it." Mr. Miller would take a careful look and compliment the boy on his prized marble. "Hmm," Mr. Miller would say, "only thing is this one is blue, and I sort of go for red. Do you have a red one at home?" The little boy would say "not exactly," but he had one sort of like it.

Mr. Miller would then send the boy home with the marble and peas and asked him to bring the red marble back when he found it.

Mrs. Miller, the store owners wife came back to help the man looking at the produce with an ear turned towards the conversation of the store owner and this little boy. With a smile she said, "There are two other boys like him in our community. All three are very poor. Jim (Mr. Miller) just loves to bargain with them for peas, apples, tomatoes, or whatever. When they come back with red marbles he decides he doesn't like red marbles and sends them back with a bag of produce searching for another color.

Years later Mr. Miller had passed away. The man who had witnessed his kind acts happened to be in town the night of his viewing. The friends he was visiting wanted to attend and the man decided to join them.

As they arrived and waited in line, offering condolences to the family of this generous man, ahead of them in line were three finely dressed men. One was in an Army uniform and the other two in nice dark suites with white shirts. All were very professional looking.

The three young men approached Mrs. Miller, standing composed and smiling by her husband's casket. Each of the young men hugged her and then kissed her on the cheek. They spoke briefly with her and moved on to the casket. Her light blue misty eyes followed them one by one, as each young man stopped briefly and placed his own warm hand over the cold pale hand in the casket. Each left the mortuary wiping his eyes in recognizable sorrow.

The man's turn came to meet Mrs. Miller. He reminded her of the story she told him so long ago about her husband's generous bargaining with the marbles. With her eyes glistening, she took the man's hand and led him to the casket. "Those three young men who just left were the boys I told you about," she said.

They just told me how they appreciated the things Jim 'traded' them. Now, at last, when Jim could not change his mind about color or size... they came to pay their debt."

Mrs. Miller said: "We've never had a great deal of the wealth, but right now, Jim would consider himself the richest man in the world."

With loving gentleness, the story is told, she lifted the lifeless fingers of her deceased husband.

Resting underneath were three exquisitely shined red marbles.

How does this story touch you? Have you ever had an adult or someone in your life that has shown you kindness and mercy? Someone who has made a lasting impact on your life? Are you paying that compassion forward?

I don’t know about you, but for me, there is nothing sweeter and more gratifying than to be in a position to help someone else. I especially like those opportunities when I get to mentor to others; when I can share my knowledge or past experiences to help someone be more successful in their journey.

I encourage you to use your skills and talents to help others. It can be in a small way like in this story or it can be a bold outright act of mentoring others. However you choose to give back, I guarantee you will get as much or more out of the act of giving than others will, from receiving your wisdom.

Give back and together our community will grow to reach its full potential. Happy Trading!

Larkin

This story was adapted from: Red Marbles and a Very Kind Leader by Mike Rogers