I Love To Do Laundry!

“Helping, fixing and serving represent three different ways of seeing life. When you help, you see life as weak. When you fix, you see life as broken. When you serve, you see life as whole. Fixing and helping may be the work of the ego, but service is the work of the soul.”

~ Rachel Naomi Remen 

The associate pastor of my church made a bold declaration from the pulpit a few weeks ago. Kory stood in front of the congregation to deliver his opening morning address. With unabashed confidence and conviction he declared in front of everyone, “I love to do laundry!”

The audience, somewhat stunned by this brash statement, listened intently for an explanation or clues as to why this was important business to come before the congregation. Some giggled. Some woke from their day dreaming. Most of us wondered in amazement what this could mean.

Kory went on to further explain that not only does he like doing laundry, he especially likes doing the laundry when Sorrel (his wife) doesn’t ask him to do it. He said that anytime he comes through the house and there is laundry to be folded, he pops on the TV, sits down and goes to work.

Folding away and watching TV he loses all track of time and the clothes are folded before he knows it. If he can incorporate something he wants to do into the chore, like watching a game or a TV program, it makes the act of folding laundry that much more enjoyable.

“This is not all completely true”, Kory explained as he finally came clean in his confession. He said what he really likes is for his wife to notice that he has done the laundry without having to ask. He wants the recognition, the praise and the pat on the back that he has done a good job. He wants her to make a big fuss over his effort.

Don’t we all.

Don’t we all do things because we know how others will react? Don’t we want people to tell us that we have done a good job? Don’t we want recognition for a job well done? Even if the chore or work we are doing is a blessing to someone else, isn’t it about our own pride and egos that is our motivation for pitching in to help in the first place? Isn’t it truly all about us?

Kory went on to further explain that at times his plan to gain his wife’s adoration and affection has backfired. One time as he was walking through the bedroom there was a large pile of clothes on the bed sorted out by colors. Without thinking he popped on the game and went to folding. A couple of hours later Sorrel asked what happened to the laundry on the bed. Kory stated he had folded them all and put them away. I can only imagine Sorrel’s look (I’ve seen it from my wife many times). She informed him that those were all dirty and she had sorted them to be washed. Doh!

I don’t want to discourage you from helping others. In fact, I have said it before, there is no greater joy you can have for yourself that to truly help someone else in their time of need. What I do encourage you to do though is to take a moment and take a sniff of the “clothes” you are folding. Discover what your motives for helping are. Are they clean? Are they pure? Are you helping because someone truly needs your help or advice; or are you helping so that you will get the credit?

We have tons of nonprofits and charities in our community who need your help. They need you to physically help. They need your financial help. They may even need your leadership by serving on a board or committee. Serve with pure motives. Serve with a giving heart. Do the work not only for your own satisfaction but for the benefit of others and for the good of our community.

I’m hoping your days ahead are filled with the scent of fresh folded laundry and our community betters because of it!

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* This article was originally printed in the Sunday, September 30, 2012 issue
 of The Chronicle's "Planting Seeds" column.

Find Your Passion

“If there is no passion in your life, then have you really lived? Find your passion, whatever it may be. Become it, and let it become you and you will find great things happen for you, to you and because of you.”

~ T. Alan Armstrong

If you have been reading any of my writing over the past year or so, you are probably well aware that I am a big mama’s boy. (Shocker!) I don’t use this as any type of derogatory statement. I simply want to bring attention to the fact that I like many other Southerners (and many of you), have been raised with strong beliefs in God, Family and Country.

I talk with my Momma and Daddy every other day and sometimes a couple times a day. [Side note: Momma and Daddy are terms of endearment for me. “No matter how big you get, you’re never too big for a momma and a daddy”. And as my Daddy still tells me to this day, “Boy, you’re never too big for me to take over my knee!”] I love my parents. I love everything they have taught me and what they have provided for me and my sister. We had a great childhood and I have fond memories of growing up with them. Learning how to water ski, how to fish, how to do chores, build things with my hands and drive Daddy’s truck. I could ramble on and on about the things they taught me and the lessons behind them.

We had Grandparents Day a few weeks back. I was thinking back on the many things I learned from my grandparents. I was thinking about many of the things I have been taught by my own parents. Things I want to pass down to my son. And lessons that he will hopefully learn as well as I have from his grandparents.

One thing that came out of many of my memories is something I have talked to you about before. It is the notion of passion in whatever you do. There is a photo I have that I cherish of my father doing what he does best (not chewing a coach out), refereeing high school football.

Daddy refereed junior high and high school football for 40 years. I have a photo in my office from his last football game on Friday, November 16, 2007, at the Mississippi Private School Association AAA State Championship Game between Jackson Academy and Jackson Prep.

Daddy refereed many games all over the state during his career. It wasn’t his fulltime job. He and “HIS crew” got paid little each game for their travels. They also got paid in concession stand hamburgers.

Every Thursday and Friday night he and “HIS football boys” would load up and travel to a high school stadium for 40 years. For 40 years he left me, my sister and my mother on Thursday and Friday nights to enjoy something he truly loved; something that he had a passion for. He enjoyed every minute of being with his fellow referees, coaches and players (the fans… not always).

I got to enjoy some of that time with him. Whenever our team wasn’t playing (or more often times than not) as our season ended early, I got to join him on his trips. In 40 years Daddy only missed a few nights to watch me play football or walk my sister on the field during homecoming festivities.

He has some pretty colorful stories about those times and when asked about many of them he just smiles. “HIS football boys” are still some of his closest friends today. Unfortunately “the crew” has broken up as time and jobs have taken them in different directions, but they still talk and stay up to date with each other’s families.

The passion that my daddy has for refereeing high school football is very much the same as the passion I have for the fire service. I got that passion from my grandfather – the original “Daddy Simp”. He was both a volunteer fire chief in Rosedale (MS) and a high school football referee.

I don’t know what Ethan will enjoy when he grows up. He likes both football and fire trucks right now, but whatever he is in to, I am sure he will do it with passion and determination, just like three generations of Simpsons before him. Whatever he does his mother and me and HIS Daddy Simp and Gin Gin and other grandparents will all support him.

I encourage you to find passion in your life. Whether it is passion in your church, your community, the arts, sports or a number of volunteer services; whatever you do invest your time and yourself in something that is meaningful and worthwhile. Help others. Serve others. Better our community. And do so with a cheerful heart! There is nothing as rewarding as serving others and giving of yourself to the betterment of your fellow man.

I’ll be praying you find your passion, and our community betters because of it!

Larkin

Get Off Your High Horse; Get Your Hands Dirty and Burn The Ships!

“With public sentiment, nothing can fail; without it, nothing can succeed. Consequently he who molds public sentiment goes deeper than he who enacts statutes or pronounces decisions.”

~ Abraham Lincoln

Well things are off to a great start with our 2013 class of Leadership Jones County. I hope you’ve had a chance to see the group either at the announcement ceremony at Lauren Rogers Museum of Art or in the paper the past several days. If not, hop on over to the Chamber’s Facebook page and take a look at this great group of individuals who have agreed to take on the task of becoming better leaders to enhance the future of Jones County through their commitment to bettering their leadership talents.

I’ve been thinking about leadership a lot over the last several weeks. Not only as I prepare for this year of leadership development, but also as we went through the preparation and execution of our Hurricane plans as Isaac approached the Gulf Coast and the Pine Belt. A lot of great leadership examples were relived as we were thrown back to images and memories of Hurricane Katrina in 2005.

Also on my mind a lot these days is the upcoming anniversary of September 11th, 2001 (another tragic day in American history, but a great day of compassion, love and leadership). All of these things have been weighing on my mind lately and have been the focus of my prayers.

I hope you and your families made it safe through the storms and I hope you will remember all of our emergency service personnel; police, fire, EMS, first responders, dispatchers and service men and women throughout this time of remembrance. These men and women work around the clock during emergencies. While we are in our homes trying to stay safe they are out in the community trying to keep other problems from becoming worse.

There are two leadership stories that I heard recently that I would like to share with you. The first is a story I borrowed from blogger Mike Rogers at www.teamworkandleadership.com.
Over 200 years ago, a man in civilian clothes rode past a small group of tired and battled weary soldiers. They were digging what appeared to be an important defensive position.
The leader of the group wasn't making any effort to help. He just shouted orders and threatened to punish the group if the work wasn't completed within the hour.

"Why aren't you helping?" the stranger asked on horseback.

"I'm in charge! The men do as I tell them," said the leader. He added "Help them yourself if you feel so strongly about it."

To the mean leader's surprise the stranger got off his horse and helped the men until the job was finished.

Before he left the stranger congratulated the men for their work, and approached the confused leader.

"You should notify top command next time your rank prevents you from supporting your men - and I will provide a more permanent solution," the stranger said.

Up close, the now humbled leader recognized General George Washington and was taught a lesson he would never forget!

Here is the second story.

In February 1519, Hernando Cortez set sail on the final leg of an ocean voyage that was to take him from Cuba to the distant shores of the Yucatan.

He commanded 11 ships with more than 500 soldiers, 100 sailors, and 16 horses, bound for Mexico to take the world's greatest treasure. The rare jewels, gold, silver, and sculptures sheltered on the Yucatan had been hoarded by the same army for 600 years.

Cortez had heard of riches of the Yucatan. With his men they arrived on shore. They did not go and take the treasure immediately; they waited until they were ready.
Then Cortez told his men to "Burn the boats."

The men were outraged wondering how they were going to get back to their families!
Cortez told them to burn the boats and they would conquer the Yucatan army and gain their fortune. They would take the Yucatan's boats home.

So what do these stories teach us about leadership? How do these apply to us today? To me, I learn a lot about the importance of commitment through these stories. In both, the conditions were not ideal. But the leadership was committed to the plan; the reward was greater than the sacrifice.

General Washington knew the defensive position needed to be fortified. He knew that he needed to gain the trust and respect of his men. He was willing to roll up his sleeves and get dirty with his men to get the job done. He did not let his pride or his position get in the way of accomplishing the mission.

Cortez knew that he needed to keep his men focused on their task. He knew that if they were worried about keeping the ships secure to return home, they would not keep their focus forward and might risk losing the battle. But by winning the battle and over taking the enemies ships, it was the only way for his men to get back to their families.

How often do we leave ourselves an “out”? We create back up plans. We create alternatives. We create reasons why we can’t succeed. We let our status get in the way of our success. We tell ourselves we are above those actions or we are too good to stoop to that level of involvement.

By creating these barriers and giving ourselves a backup plan, that becomes the plan.
Many of us say we want success, but aren’t willing to move forward from our normal ways of thinking. If we want different results, it requires a new way of thinking. We may need to get off our horses and get a new perspective. We may need to burn our ships to see a new way home. We must be willing to take the steps required for success to create success.

Just as we have done in the aftermath of September 11th, Hurricane Katrina, and natural disasters since, we have to roll up our sleeves and all pitch in. In order to get back on a path toward success we have to burn our ships that hold us back and move forward toward a plan of recovery and success!

Here’s to your success!

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* This article was originally printed in the Sunday, September 9, 2012 issue

of The Chronicle's "Planting Seeds" column.

I Know a Guy

“Great men are rarely isolated mountain-peaks; they are the summits of ranges.”

~ Thomas Wentworth Higginson

Have you ever been around someone who seems to know a lot about everything? Or do you know someone who seems to have an endless Rolodex of people they can call on just about any subject? In any conversation they are the ones who if they can't immediately give a solution to your problem, they exclaim, "Hey, I know a guy!"

My wife and I have an almost addictive infatuation with the History Channel's TV series Pawn Stars. We don’t mean to get into the show anytime it’s on, it’s just so dang interesting and entertaining.

The show’s main proprietor Rick is one of these people. He has a guy for everything. Cars, guns, sports, autographs, toys, historic memorabilia, it doesn’t matter; if Rick can’t retell the story of an item (and he knows a lot), he has someone who is a phone call away that can.

If you are not familiar with the show, the Gold & Silver Pawn Shop is in Las Vegas, Nevada. Three generations of the Harrison family (Grandfather Richard – “The Old Man”, son Rick and grandson Corey) jointly run the family business. There is a clashing of ideals and camaraderie in every show.

According to the History Channel website, “The three men use their sharp eyes and skills to assess the value of items from the commonplace to the truly historic, including a 16th-century samurai sword, a Super Bowl ring, a Picasso painting and a 17th-century stay of execution. It's up to them to determine what's real and what's fake, as they reveal the often surprising answer to the questions on everyone's mind, ‘What's the story behind it’ and ‘What's it worth?’”

I am sure that like many of the “reality shows” of today that much of the information is scripted and the history and stories of the pieces are researched by a whole team of experts. But I am not trying to debunk the premise of the show. What I am interested in is the subtle lessons we can learn about running a business and running our lives.

We all have unique networks in our lives. I know I do. One of these days (when I have nothing better to do) I am going to sit down and “map out” my connections. It is interesting to me that in the short time I have been in the business community and certainly since I have come into the economic and community development world, how vast my connections have become.

I have friends throughout most of the United States and even in several other countries around the globe. I obviously don’t talk to all of my friends and allies on a regular basis but I do try to make contact with everyone a couple of times a year, even if it is a quick email or Facebook message.

The thing I have come to realize about cultivating a network and broadening your connections is that you never know when you will need someone’s advice or knowledge.

Just a couple of weeks ago I was able to put two people in touch to work out a logistics issue because I had a friend in Northern Arkansas who needed some knowledge about moving cargo down to South America and when I was in Hancock County I worked with a guy who did river based trans-loading (moving cargo from river barges to large ocean going ships).

I don’t know all the details of the transaction because I just made the connection for them, but they both thanked me for the new contact and my friend in Arkansas was able to work out his issue. I was able to be that guy, “who knew a guy!”

We’ve all had those situations where we’ve needed a guy or we knew a guy who could help someone else out. I encourage you that as you conduct your business and meet new people, new individuals, new customers you explore their networks. Make new connections and stay in constant contact.

Whether you are pawning your worldly treasures or you’re trying to open your business to new markets, you never know when you might need someone’s advice or someone’s Rolodex. Never be afraid to ask for advice or help. We’ve all been there. And “you never know what you don’t know” – until you ask.

Larkin