The Bear and the Two Travelers

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom."

– Marcel Proust

“Two men were traveling together when a bear suddenly met them on their path. One of them climbed quickly up into a tree and concealed himself in the branches. The other, seeing that he must be attacked, fell flat on the ground. When the bear came up and felt him with his snout and smelt him all over, the man held his breath and feigned the appearance of death as much as he could. The bear soon left him for it is said that a bear will not touch a dead body. When the bear was gone the other traveler descended from the tree and inquired of his friend what it was the bear had whispered in his ear.

‘He gave me this advice,’ his companion replied. ‘Never travel with a friend who deserts you at the approach of danger.’”

Now, I’ve never been approached by a bear, but I have been in the company of “friends” who at the sight of conflict left my side to protect their own interests. I have also been on the receiving end of great empathy and mercy shown by some truly great friends.

Recently, our family was faced with a situation we could not wrap our minds around. Frankly, we were kind of embarrassed to ask anyone for help, because we weren’t sure what to ask for or what we even needed. We were so caught up by everything we weren’t able to process any of it.

But, even in the mist of confusion, we were surrounded by great friends. We had some strong leaders come beside us; some family members, some church leaders, some long time friends, and even some acquaintances who knew our situation and reached out to help. Almost to the person they would ask, “What do you need? How can I help?” Our reply was always the same, “I don’t know”. And then, each one would say, “We’ll figure it out, together.”

It is amazing to have friends. A support network who can help you figure it out, together.

Sometimes in business and in life we don’t always know what we need. We know we are facing hard times and struggles, but we may not actually know how to communicate our hardship with others. It’s okay. We don’t always have to have all the answers. We just need a little time, a lot of compassion for one another, and a friend or two who are willing to help us figure it out, together.

We have a great community. I have heard time and time again, story after story about people in our community helping each other out. Not only in times of major disasters like tornados or fires or something truly devastating to the masses, but individual and personal times of hardship; financial crisis, family crisis, business issues, and others.

We all have struggles we face. We all have experiences we can share to help others. I hope you will take some time to be a friend to someone who needs it. Take time to listen. Take time to hurt with them. And then, take time to work out a solution, together.

I know if you do, our community will be stronger, our businesses will grow stronger, and our friendships will be bonded tighter, together.

I'm looking forward to your success!


- The story above was taken from Aesop’s Fables.

* This article was originally printed in the Sunday, September 21, 2014 issue of The Chronicle's "Planting Seeds" column.

Woodcutters

“The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place."

~ George Bernard Shaw

"Two pulpwood cutters from deep east Texas grew tired of cutting pulpwood and decided to go to Dallas to get another job. As they drove, they saw a sign that said 'Love Field'. So they whipped their pulpwood truck into Love Field and drove right up to the main office.

One of the men said to his brother, 'You stay in the truck and I'll go in and see if I can get a job.' He went inside and found the man who was in charge of hiring, and said to him, 'I want a job'. The man asked, 'What can you do?' The brother replied, 'I'm a pile-it (pilot).' The main said, 'We need lots of those around here. You've got a job.' He hired him on the spot.

The pulpwood cutter went back outside to the truck and said to his brother, 'I got me a job. They hired me on the spot. Why don't you go in and see if they have a job for you?' His brother said, 'Okay, you wait here in the truck, and I'll go in and see if they will hire me.' He went inside and told the man, 'I want a job.' The man asked, 'What can you do?' He replied, 'I'm a wood cutter.'

The man said, 'Fellow, this is an air field. We don't need any woodcutters around here.' The woodcutter then responded, 'But, you just hired my brother.' The man responded, 'Yes, but he said he was a pilot.'

The brother responded, 'Well, how do you think he's going to pile it if I don't cut it?”

Clear communication and clearly understood expectations are vital in any business. They are vital in life and they are vital to the interactions we have with each other.

If you don't clearly communicate your needs, you'll end up with what you asked for.

I've come to learn this lesson on a daily basis raising two boys. If I don't specifically tell my son to put his socks on his feet first and then put his shoes on over his socks on his feet, I'll end up having to remove socks from ears and shoes tied on hands, putting us even further behind when we are already late to school.

Do you ever have days like these? Do you ever have projects or goals you didn't meet because your team didn't complete their assigned objectives? Can you say with certainty that the objectives and expectations of those objectives were clearly defined for each team member? Did each member know what the others were doing so that the team understood explicitly the overall goals of the team?

Sometimes we as leaders think we clearly explain goals and objectives because that is how we would like to hear them. Often we have to think about how others interpret our expectations and how we can better communicate so that others will understand.

Whatever you are doing, I hope you take the time to think about how you are communicating with your team members, your coworkers, your family, and your kids. Don't just settle for, and allow extra time to pull socks off ears. Take some time to clearly communicate your instructions. Make sure others understand your expectations. Reward them when they complete them successfully and help them learn when they don't. I know that if you take the time to do these things your teams will be more cohesive, your family will be a little happier and you won't be so frustrated when deadlines are close. And, I know our community will be better off because of it!

I'm looking forward to your success!

* This article was originally printed in the Sunday, September 7, 2014 issue of The Chronicle's "Planting Seeds" column.