“When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I
could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one,
I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.”
~Mark Twain
Happy
Father’s Day! I hope you are having a great day enjoying friends, family and
the fathers in your life. If you are fortunate enough to still have your father
in your life, make sure you tell them just how important they are to you.
Father’s
Day and Mother’s Day, Grandparent’s Day, Valentine’s Day, Boss’ Day and the
like are always difficult days for me. They are supposed to be the one day of
the year when you remember to tell that special person just how important they
are to you.
Well…
I just wasn’t raised that way. I was taught you tell the ones you love just how
much they mean to you as often as you can because we never know how long we
have to share together.
This
has been a great philosophy for me and served me well over the years as I have
lost friends and loved ones along the way. I hope my love and respect for my
friends and family never goes unspoken.
As I
have been preparing for this Father’s Day I have thought a lot about my dad. I
know I write a lot about my family but it is because we have always been so
close. Even now I speak with my parents almost daily. They always know what is
going on with Ethan and they usually know what Rebekah and I are up to. I still
use them for sounding boards of ideas of things I am thinking of pursuing and I
am always looking to them for advice; especially from my dad.
I think daddy really likes giving advice, although he never just comes
out and says what is on his mind. Some of my favorites he has given me over the
years are: “Bad company corrupts good morals”, “Lay down with the dogs
and you wake up with fleas”, “Nothing good happens after midnight” – (and for my family members who will read
this story online, you don’t need to comment on that story), “You
can’t soar with the eagles if you stay out with the owls”, “Keep it between the
ditches” and many, many more.
My favorite advice I’ve gotten from my dad was the day we
had “The Talk”. We were riding back to town from our cabin across the levee on
the river. He said, “I want to talk to you about something” – as he sometimes
did. I said, “Okay”. He turned the radio down and said, “Son, keep your pencil
in your pocket.” There was a moment of silence. Then he said, “You understand?”
I said “Yes sir” he turned up the radio and we never spoke about it again. – Of
course now we laugh about it all the time.
Fathers
are good for giving advice, they are good for teaching life lessons and they
are good for helping us grow to better ourselves and those around us. As I am
preparing to raise two little boys in the coming weeks (Noah is expected to
arrive in July), I read a lot of articles and blogs online to help me be a
better father and raise our children the way Rebekah and I were raised. I heard
this great story the other day. I hope it helps you too.
There
once was a little boy who had a short temper. His father decided to teach him a
lesson by giving him a bag of nails and telling him that every time he lost his
temper he was required to hammer one nail into the backyard fence.
Over
the next several weeks the little boy had driven in 47 nails! As the weeks
progressed he was driving in fewer and fewer nails as he learned to control his
temper.
Eventually
the boy had learned how to control his temper most of the time. His father was
proud and suggested that he pull out one nail for every day that he had
completely controlled his temper.
Many
days had passed when the boy went to tell his father that all of the nails were
gone.
The
wise father took his son by the hand and they walked to the fence. He said,
“Great job son, you have done really well, and I am very proud of you! But I
want you to notice the holes. This fence will never be the same. When you say
things in anger, you leave a scar just like you have left in this fence.”
From
that day forward the boy was determined never to lose his temper again.
Great fathers know how to allow us to learn without having to spell out
everything we need to hear. Just like the lesson this little boy learned from
his father, I have learned many lessons from my father. I am still learning
from him.
I sincerely hope that you have a father or a father figure in your life
who constantly challenges you, loves you and teaches you. If you are the result
of having a father teach you to be a better person, repay the favor. Teach your
children, teach the kids in your neighborhood, teach the kids in your church
and in your community. Let’s be a community of positive role models who build
each other up and grow the next generation better. I am sure that if you take
the time to invest in others, our whole community will be better because of it!
I know it will!
Love
you pop!
---* This article was originally printed in the Sunday, June 16, 2013 issue of The Chronicle's "Planting Seeds" column.
No comments:
Post a Comment